Haven't posted in awhile - the usual reasons, of course, but also, just been so far down in the swamps of misery that trying to express myself felt impossible. I guess I'm coming back up now.
We all expect to outlive our horses-or at least most of them. I'm getting to the age now where the reverse might be possible. But nobody wants to think about that. I do actually. Why? Because I work with a volunteer group that deals with missing, lost, or stolen horses (primarily) and what happens to them. Of course, sometimes things work out well and things turn out just peachy. We've helped reunite hundreds of horses and owners. But we also get into horses that have been tortured and killed to get back at someone, just shot for no apparent reason, starved, abused, and sold for slaughter. So I worry about what will happen to mine if I'm not here to have a say in their care.
In the past year or so, I've written about my loss of my App mare, Brassy, and making the decision to put Buddy down. Well, recently, I had to put down Suleimon (I raised him from a 4 month old) and Allura (got her at age 12). They were just shy of their 28th birthdays. The same day I had to put Suleimon down, we found Zhak dead. Don't know why - no evidence of colic. Just dead. He was Allura's first foal.
Suleimon was the one I had poured my heart and soul into. I had trained him and worked with him extensively. You can't put that much time and energy into a relationship without feeling a huge sense of loss when it is gone. He was one of those "once in a lifetime" horses, too. Charismatic, a charmer, show-off, immensely good at whatever he was asked to do.
But - it seems that the God of horses and all things wise and wonderful may have given me another chance-and I didn't know it. Both Redford and Cricket are telling me that they have the same potential. Both are charismatic horses. Both are drop dead gorgeous. I need to teach them, but they are both smart and quick. I need them more than they need me at the moment.
We'll work it out.
