When Your Horse Isn't There

Ever thought about what you will do when your horse just isn't THERE?

Now most of the time, it will be because the rascal was just asleep and didn't know the others walked off and left to come up to the stable to be fed. But your panic is, oh, so real.

After 50+ years of owning horses, I still do this. You'd think I'd know better-but no. I have learned to carry a knife and cell phone with me as well as a lead and halter. Nine times out of ten, I walk back with nothing only to see the cause of worry up at the gate looking perfectly innocent. Ah, well, needed the exercise anyway.

That tenth time, though, can be a real pain in the sitter. I've found mares with a new baby that has tumbled into something and is now upside down with no possible way of righting itself-mom is, naturally enough, frantic. There have been horses caught in fencing I didn't even know was there-left from who knows when-and my horse is up to their hinny or chest in the stuff. (That's a risk you take when you purchase property that was once owned by a farming family-they don't always remove all the fencing.)

Once my stallion tried to service the neighbor's mare who had been teasing him. She'd backed up to the panel gate, but was inexperienced at the job, so she moved away. Yep, he crashed down on his___ on top of the gate. The metal crushed down just enough to allow his feet to barely touch the ground-and there he stayed until I found him-madder than a whole nest of hornets. Husband and I had to remove the gate completely to get him off. That horse never did give that mare the time of day after that. It was probably a good thing he couldn't get to her. He would have given her one heck of a beat down.

But there's also the "oh, no-the horse just isn't HERE" situation, too-and that's a whole new bucket of worms. Here you have two or three possibilities:

• something happened to make them get out-fireworks, chased by dogs, kids on dirtbikes, ATVs, etc., wildlife, etc. 
• someONE left them out whether for a prank, stupidity, or whatever-the gate was open and the horses took off
• theft or intentional taking-and I'll get to this in greater detail. 

What do you do?

1. Breathe-panic is not going to help. 
2. Call family/friends and enlist help. 
3. Call work and tell them you'll be late. 
4. Call the local law enforcement. Chances are darn good if horses are out-somebody has already seen and called it in. 
5. Hitch up a truck and trailer-you might not need it, but you want to be ready to roll. 
6. Get cell phone numbers of everybody and fan out. Make sure everyone has a halter, lead, and feed bucket-and knows NOT to run after a horse. (If you run up behind one, they assume you are chasing and will run away that much faster. WALK in the same direction parallel to them until you get AHEAD of them.)
7. Look particularly well around places where there are other horses. Herd instinct will kick in and they will go to where other horses are. Even horses that you consider to be 'loners' will go to other horses-at least within sight of them. It's a safety instinct. 
8. Remember to look carefully in ditches, ravines, old wells, culverts, septic tanks, and the like. Even swimming pools can be horse traps. They fall in and can't get out. 
9. Check your hay-I'm not kidding. They'll climb the hay stack, loft stairs, whatever-and be up there looking down at you. Silly horses. 
10. Check every building with an opening-I've seen photos of draft horses that got into sheds and the walls had to be torn down to get them out. They are nosy and will get themselves into some interesting places. 
11. If no luck within 4 hours, print flyers with your name, cellphone, and email, GOOD photos of horse, and start papering the area with them. Recommended distance to start with is 10 miles first day, 25 miles the second. 
12. Still missing? Contact www.netposse.com and get them involved. Now that, my friends, is serious help. 

More to come. 

Finally getting back to the horses-it's been awhile

Okay, I admit it-it has been a tremendous dry spell and if you had asked if I would have every taken so long to get back into the saddle, I would have told you that you were crazy. However, depression is a funny thing-and losing five horses inside of one year-three of which I raised from foals-just takes the pleasure right out of it. I mean there's just nothing there. 

Plus-my husband wanted me to sell my trailer-and that just didn't sit well with me. I balked-even though I did place the ads. Now things have worked around that he sees things the way I did originally-that we need to dump the big truck and big stock trailer instead and get a smaller utility trailer that the Frontier can pull. I'll still have to repair the Brenderup's ramp, but I will get to keep it. This works. Life is looking up. 

So now I can clean the saddles, dust off the bridles, and start thinking about getting my butt back into the saddles again. My mood is going back to the positive-back in control. I might be older, crankier, and not as easy to get off the ground as before, but at least I'm going again. 

Besides-I'd much rather leave this world while out with the horses than sitting inside wishing I had been. Here's to horse sweat, bruises, and being tired! 

180

I was working at my desk on September 25, 2005 when I was called to the CEO's office about 4:00 PM. It was a Friday. She was fairly new at the job, and I was wary of her. I had told a friend that I thought heads would start rolling with her coming in. She advised to give her a chance. I told her that my gut was seldom wrong. My favorite boss was her predecessor-and he and the CFO had recently departed. I was not feeling any moves towards stability with this woman after three months.

When I walked in, I knew what was coming. The CEO, COO, and the HR manager were present. That's never a good combination. What shocked me was that they had the unmitigated gall to have me sign a contract not to compete with the place for 2 years, not to apply back to the place ever again, and then to try to inform me that I 'should have no trouble finding a new position elsewhere.' The first two were illegal and the last was totally unrealistic in my field. (explanation to follow) Moreover, I was treated like an enemy and escorted to my office, then out the door-I could not access my personal files or get my personal items out of my office. I haven't the slightest clue what they thought I could steal, damage, or destroy. But I was locked out until the following day when I could get back in.

I did get my personal things out, including a large bookshelf that I had put in, several large framed items, plants, books and files that were solely mine. They called me-asking where these things were and asking why I had taken them. The answer was very simple-I had taken them up there and I was not donating them. They were mine and I was retrieving them. Evidently, other people thought differently. They never got them back.

Moral to this tale is-keep your parachute packed, boys and girls. Always know where that resume is and keep those references current. I'd been there 15 years. Loyalty means nothing. If you aren't in a union, but can get in one, do so. It is your only protection against this stuff. I didn't used to think much of unions. I have changed my mind totally. Complete 180.

So here I sit 10 years later-still not working and waiting on my first Social Security check.  I'd kill for a paycheck.

Tough Year

Haven't posted in awhile - the usual reasons, of course, but also, just been so far down in the swamps of misery that trying to express myself felt impossible. I guess I'm coming back up now.

We all expect to outlive our horses-or at least most of them. I'm getting to the age now where the reverse might be possible. But nobody wants to think about that. I do actually. Why? Because I work with a volunteer group that deals with missing, lost, or stolen horses (primarily) and what happens to them. Of course, sometimes things work out well and things turn out just peachy. We've helped reunite hundreds of horses and owners. But we also get into horses that have been tortured and killed to get back at someone, just shot for no apparent reason, starved, abused, and sold for slaughter. So I worry about what will happen to mine if I'm not here to have a say in their care.

In the past year or so, I've written about my loss of my App mare, Brassy, and making the decision to put Buddy down. Well, recently, I had to put down Suleimon (I raised him from a 4 month old) and Allura (got her at age 12). They were just shy of their 28th birthdays. The same day I had to put Suleimon down, we found Zhak dead. Don't know why - no evidence of colic. Just dead. He was Allura's first foal.

Suleimon was the one I had poured my heart and soul into. I had trained him and worked with him extensively. You can't put that much time and energy into a relationship without feeling a huge sense of loss when it is gone. He was one of those "once in a lifetime" horses, too. Charismatic, a charmer, show-off, immensely good at whatever he was asked to do.

But - it seems that the God of horses and all things wise and wonderful may have given me another chance-and I didn't know it. Both Redford and Cricket are telling me that they have the same potential. Both are charismatic horses. Both are drop dead gorgeous. I need to teach them, but they are both smart and quick. I need them more than they need me at the moment.

We'll work it out.

It's a tough choice-and sometimes you only have A. no B, C.

Euthanasia - everybody has a love/hate relationship with it. It is one of those truths that every horse owner must face at some point - although some try to avoid it by giving or selling the horse away prior to the end of life. I never have. I've always met it head on. That's just me.

There is the possibility that you might meet it in spite of everything due to illness or injury. Colic, poisoning, broken bones, - there are just any number of things that can lead to the decision of now or later - and sometimes there is no later.

In the past year, I have lost four horses. Only one died without me. I lost two within 72 hours. This has been a grueling year emotionally. Yet - would I do it again? Yes - without a doubt.

As an owner, my philosophy is that I have made a commitment to them to make sure that ALL their days are taken care of, and, when those days are ended, that they exit life as quickly and as painlessly as I can possibly make it. I have to love them ENOUGH to let them go. It is my responsibility to love them so much that I am unwilling to allow them to suffer, be put through ownership changes that confuse them and frighten them, face auctions, face uncertain deaths of starvation, abuse, or a slaughterhouse, and to be certain of their proper burial/disposal. It is their RIGHT as a creature of God. It is my duty to comply with that right.

So I lost my stallion, Buddy; Suleimon, my gelding and partner for 26 years; Yitzhak, another gelding, aged 17 who was the first foal born here; and Allura, my Arabian broodmare and Queen of the pastures. The pastures seem to have such huge holes in them where they are supposed to be. The fence line seem bereft of their presence looking for me.

I fulfilled my responsibility and duty towards them. I loved them enough.

Wealthy? hmmmmm

Some very rich old fart wants a million votes for every million he pays in taxes. While I sincerely hope the old boy is speaking with his tongue so far into his cheek that he's biting the root off, just the mere thought that he would even JOKE about it makes my egalitarian blood boil. Just who does he think he is? And why does he think his money is entitling him to more and better than me? This isn't the land of royalty, buster. You want to be king - go buy yourself an island and set yourself up. Not allowed here by law.

Another one is arguing that anyone NOT filthy rich should be feeling wealthy and privileged because of how we compare to the rest of the world. And there is some validity to this argument. I've made it myself on occasion. We should. There is a limit to the logic however. The limit is - we don't live in the rest of the world. We live HERE. Appreciating what I have is well and good IN CONTEXT. When that context changes, we have a problem.

My problem started on 9/25/2005 when my income went from middle class to zero. That's a problem.

Do not let anybody tell you that unemployment makes you want to sit on your ass. They lie. They lie a lot. Unemployment doesn't even start to pay the bills. It might pay 1/3. Nobody wants to hear you've been laid off. They want their money.  Screw you.

Do not believe people when they tell you that ageism doesn't exist anymore. They lie.

Do not believe anyone who tells you that it will be easy to go out and find another job. They lie.

The hardest job you will ever have is finding a job. The second hardest will be keeping it. Telling yourself anything else is just plain stupid. This is work and you'd better be willing to get in there and slog hard at it and then some more.

Nobody said it was easy-but it is worth doing. There may not be do overs, but mistakes can be forgiven. Keep trying.

http://edition.cnn.com/2014/02/15/opinion/erickson-super-rich/

The Time

The we all know we'll come to at some point is here for one of my herd - a gentle but strong mare named Allura. She'd be 27 on April 1, but she won't make it. You see, she have a mouth that has lost so many teeth that she cannot enjoy her food anymore, her weight is dropping, and now I've found a good sized tumor on her neck.

Since I had a melanoma removed from her ear several years ago (that's a very unusual site), I knew that it was probably the malignant variety. Horses' melanomas are seldom malignant - a fact that has fascinated researchers for years, but they can turn into that. The one in her ear was oozing black sear which, normally, they don't. They're usually just hard little knots on the tail, genitalia, and belly exposed skin of grey horses. This one on her neck is much bigger, it's under the hair, and it seems rooted in the muscle.

I first saw Allura when she was a two year old and a blue roan filly at a friend's pasture. She was lovely-undeniably the best in the pasture. Never thought once of actually owning her. Thirteen years later, I purchased her in foal and she was snow white. She has never been trained for anything - she's just been a broodmare. I'm the only one who has ever really handled her. She had 6 gorgeous foals for me - I still have three and two grandbabies.

Now it is time to do what's right for her. I need to send my beautiful mare on to God's pastures to run free, graze as much as she wants, and have shady trees to rest under. She knows. She's good with it. I'll miss her.